Day 124: Write With New Writing Partner, Apply for A Fellowship

One writing date fell through due to scheduling, but then another one magically popped up!  Hurrah!

I have decided to reach high and apply for a fellowship, which I’ve never done before.  Nothing to lose but some time spent on a cover letter and c.v.

 

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Day 122: Intervened

Sat down with a friend, told them how they were hurting themselves.  Not an easy thing to do.  Not something I’ve done often.  But my friend is worth it.

Thankfully, they were receptive.  Hopefully things will get better.

Day 120: Meet New People, Have Deeper Conversation With Friend, Drink Homemade Lime Soda

I like to talk.  A lot.

When I was a kid, I was the anti-poster child for stranger danger.  I talked to everyone, clerks, librarians, surly dudes on the street, skeletons of dinosaurs at the museum.  My mother sometimes reminded me, “Give someone else a chance to talk.”

As a freshman in college, my Intro to the Humanities professor told me, “While I’m philosophically opposed to telling a young woman to talk less in class, I must ask you to slow down a bit.”

I’ve purposefully sought jobs that require to talk to a lot of people–teaching, leading tours, coordinating field trips, training volunteers, administering surveys.  I love people and always scored high in the “helping professions” on career aptitude tests, but I know I would be a terrible therapist because I would never shut up. However, I do genuinely enjoy listening to people as well, which is probably why I still have friends.  Though really, if I’m honest, I know that I cultivated good listening skills partially so that I can hear other peoples’ stories and thus have more things to talk about.

I think this is why I like Quaker silent worship and come back to it over and over again.  It goes entirely against my nature to sit very still and be very quiet.  But, I do like listening, which is what silent worship is meant for.  Just listening to your own mind rattle around, then eventually settle down.  I tend to find meaning in busyness and humans and messy complicated cultural-historical symbols that blare all over the place like inherited neon signs, but silent worships helps me find me in quiet and emptiness.

A byproduct of this natural tendency and a lifetime of feedback means that when I meet new people I am both desperately excited to talk to them.  (New!  Friends!  With new stories!)  and very self-conscious about talking too much.

So, tonight when I met some new people who had been described to me as “posh as shit”  (they were) and the conversation and homemade Lenten soda flowed, I kept hearing this small polite voice suggest that perhaps I shouldn’t open my mouth quite so much.  I gallantly ignored it most of the time, but it did sway me on a few occasions.

On the way home, my friend who had invited me to the shindig and I started to talk.  After we had exhausted the initial small talk we started in on bigger stuff.  I ended up having one of the more personal and meaningful conversations with that friend that I’ve ever had.  Which wouldn’t have happened if we hadn’t babbled though all the superficial stuff.

Sometimes, I think conversation is a lot like writing.  When you are trying to get to the heart of a piece, you often have to write a lot, if nothing else to get the crap out of the way so you can settle into the core of the story.

 

Day 118: Try A New Exercise Class, Make Some Career Plans, Make A List

Notes, in the order of the post title:

1)  Ouch.  Very enthusiastic spinning instructor.  Like a gerbil in spandex.

2) After much research and consideration, decided I’m interested in pursuing development work–combines research, writing, and all the places I love need money.

3)  New Acts I Want to Do Next Month:

  • dye the bottom inch of my hair bright purple
  • submit a creative non fiction piece
  • enter a fiction contest
  • host a dissolute creativity night
  • actually do my computer tutoring session
  • go out to a new play, concert, or reading
  • read a new book by an author I’ve never read before
  • take a new class or workshop
  • go to a tea-tasting with my friend C.(never done a tea tasting and never hung out with C. one-on-one, and I want to do both!)

New Acts I am considering doing in the next 6 months

  • starting a book project
  • piercing my nose
  • going to the Indiana dunes
  • helping out with a convention
  • creating a business with Husbandit involving games and museum consulting(already doing the work, considering formalizing our ventures)
  • participate in a story-telling or reading event.